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Comfort, Conflict, and Contentment


So I made my eldest daughter cry this week. I picked them up from Gymnastics and when they got in the car my eldest daughter verbalized her frustrations.  "Mom Gina yelled at me tonight because I wasn't doing my turns right."  Now, I am her mother and I should have responded differently but I said: "Good I am glad because that means she is pushing you."  I felt the death glare coming from the back seat and she continued to share her frustrations with and I continued to say that it was a good thing.   The problem was she was tired, eleven, and didn't have the tools in her emotional toolbox to hear what I was saying and so we hugged I told her I loved her and she went to bed.  The next day I apologized to her and tried to again explain to her that I didn't want to see her comfortable and get stagnant.  Growth involves struggle, work, pressure, and sometimes pain.  When you are comfortable you stop growing.   We don't allow that to dull our senses or look for ways to be comfortable but we can choose a different way, a way of contentment.
We all want to be comfortable.
  It is human nature to look for comfort.  I see it in my small community when people try to leverage relationships rather than work hard.  Integrity and Character require more effort than resting connections.  People think that if they become 'yes' men or consistently focus on giving attention to a person in power it will allow them to be comfortable as they schmooze their way to the top.  Others will stay in a bad situation that they hate but they are afraid to take a step towards change and fixing the situation.  Some want to blame everyone else on why they can't move forward.  No matter the reason we all look for ways to stay in known places. We want comfortable and so we will sabotage ourselves, sell ourselves, and trade whatever we need to in order to stay comfortable.
We all want to avoid conflict
I am probably the only person that goes straight into conflict and while it is uncomfortable I continue to press into it.  Why? Because many times we want to maintain our known situations that are killing us if it isn't assessed, diagnosed, and treated you can never get better.  Many people shy away from conflict for various reasons.   To address the problem, they will try to treat symptoms.  At times this means demonizing people that disagree with you, talking over other people, being passive-aggressive, avoiding those that make you uncomfortable and giving excuses on why you can't move forward.  Again it has to do with staying comfortable.  There is a saying that I heard by John Maxwell: you will change when it because too painful to stay the same.  Conflict is the greatest catalyst to change and while we shouldn't go looking for the conflict we must be willing to embrace the discomfort so that on the other side we can bring change to our situation and maybe the situation of others.
We need to embrace contentment
Paul says I have learned to be content in all situations, he says this and I think there is something to be said for learning how to be content.  Contentment doesn't just happen, it is a fruit of a mindset.  Both conflict and comfort have to do with us, our feelings, and our reactions.  We want the fruit of comfort so we avoid conflict, and we keep trying anything we can to stay comfortable.  So Paul says this: in Philliapians 4:10-14 10 I rejoiced in the Lord greatly that once again you renewed your care for me. You were, in fact, concerned about me but lacked the opportunity to show it. 11 I don’t say this out of need, for I have learned to be content in whatever circumstances I am. 12 I know both how to have a little, and I know how to have a lot. In any and all circumstances I have learned the secret of being content—whether well fed or hungry, whether in abundance or in need. 13 I am able to do all things through Him[b] who strengthens me.
So here is the secret to contentment, it is trusting that God is with you and is strengthening you in the middle of everything.  When we choose to look up rather than around at our circumstances, well we see Christ, we see a different view. Many times it isn't a lack of opportunity to change our lives it is a lack of faith and our mindset isn't set on being content that I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. When we don't strive for ourselves but allow the Lord to lead us we are confident through Christ.  We know that whatever comes our way we can do and go through.  
 Maybe you are in the middle of a messy situation and fear is tangible.  You are tired and frustrated and do not have the tools in your emotional toolbox to move forward.  Can I encourage you today to look up at who Christ is, know that like Paul you can do all things through Christ who strengthens you?  What is strengthening you right now?  Is it comfort, conflict, or contentment? 

 Challenge: Are you reacting to your present circumstances?  Are you running from your current circumstances?  Are you trusting God in the middle of your circumstance?  How can you choose contentment today?  
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=51AJtsUVKFA

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